Are you at the end of your rope? Do you believe the whisperer as he whispers in your ear you are dumb and will never amount to any good? Are you letting a bad day or month or year define who you are?
Have you lost all hope?
No one escapes the messages they received about their self-worth, their personhood. Messages come in all forms such as praise, edification, guidance, uplifting or perhaps destruction, lies, invalidation, tearing down, to name a few. Some messages were blatant while others were disguised.
Messages can be misleading. Perhaps they suggest that looks helped us to succeed in life, a job, a relationship, while others said we’d never make it, who’d want you, I disown you, you’re stupid, too thin, too fat, too pretty, too ugly or you’re trash.
The messages we receive, good or bad, often become the filter on how we see ourselves, the world, our job, our family, our friends, and perhaps even God. Some people know the message they received while others aren’t sure or claim they don’t have one.
And when our day is really bad, we might say, “Nobody understands me. Nobody understands my pain, knows what happened to me or what I’ve been through.”
It is true that we are all unique and our pain is our personal story but it is also true that nothing is new under the sun, therefore someone will understand, at least a piece of your story. You just have to share.
But the enemy, the whisperer, makes us feel ashamed and so we hide or mask our pain and our stories with pride so we don’t share. This is how the enemy divides and conquers. He separates us from the light and casts the shadow of dark doubt over us.
Sometimes we don’t see the tiniest sliver and we don’t think anything of it until our finger begins to throb with pain, gets red with infection and festers with puss. Now we can’t ignore it because it really hurts. We don’t cut our finger off to ease the pain, rather we know we need to dig in and get it out or the infection will get worse. It hurts to dig it out but we welcome the relief that will follow.
The whisperer is like a pimp who has been stalking his prey because he knows one day we will trip, fall and cry out that nobody loves me or understands me, I’m lost, I don’t matter, who will care. He gets us at our most vulnerable moments and knows just the right thing to say. And because we are hurting, grieving, frustrated, sad, lost and unsure he thinks he won.
Why then don’t we look at the lie(s) as a sliver that needs to come out of us? I’m thinking because it hurts to dig deep into ourselves and get to the root of a problem. And I’m thinking because sometimes it’s hard to see past our pain and believe it can ever get better.
If you feel like you’re at the end of your rope and you believe the lies that make you want to harm yourself, understand that that’s what they are, lies. They may challenge us, but they don’t define who we are nor do they define our self-worth.
We are valuable. We are created in God’s image and He, God that is, does not make mistakes or junk. He is not the deceiver. He does not whisper you failed, you are stupid, you are dumb, you are trash. He says you are a lovely person, amazing, and someone whom He is pleased with and loves!
It’s an ongoing battle to recognize the negative voice . I’m reminded of when I taught my nephew to say: Go Away Monsters God is Bigger Than You (click to read blog).
The enemy (Satan) wants to leave us for dead, bury us alive or have us live like the walking dead.
But Jesus rose from the dead and overcame the grave and the darkness. Life is hard enough, but I’m thankful I have Jesus to shed light on the corners of darkness that want to swallow me alive.
And flowers push themselves up through the hard cold dirt of winter because they are drawn to the warmth and the light of the spring sun. They are not drawn to the cold dark. And in the light they bloom and share their brilliant colors and fragrance. That is all God wants for us. To share our unique color and fragrance and be a light.
Do you have any slivers that need to come out of you?
Mini series on – What’s your self-image worth?
- Part 1- A Bowl of Onions
- Part 2- A Red Dress
- Part 3- The lies or the Victory of Hope
So glad to see your faith incorporated into your blogs! S.B.(FL)
April 14, 2017 8:38PM
It takes a lot to overcome our self image! You do a terrific job of explaining it.